A day in the life of Ramzan Kadyrov

Tuesday was not a good day for Ramzan Kadyrov, Chechnya’s petulant leader.

First, he lost a court case, and Kadyrov doesn’t lose anything. A Moscow court ruled that Oleg Orlov, a leading human rights activist, did not defame Kadyrov when he accused him of complicity in the murder of his colleague Natalia Estemirova.

“It’s a miracle,” Orlov, the head of human rights group Memorial, told journalists outside the court. Estemirova, Chechnya’s leading human rights activist through her work at the Grozny branch of Memorial, was kidnapped outside her home in July 2009 and found shot dead hours later. In the wake of the brutal killing, Orlov said Kadyrov was responsible for her death.

Kadyrov denied the claim and in video testimony to the court said: “My hands are very white and clean,” according to the New York Times. “I had a manicure the day before yesterday.” Glad he’s taking it all very seriously.

Hours after the court threw out the defamation charges, Kadyrov lost something else: the superstar coach of his pet project, Chechnya’s main soccer club Terek Grozny. Terek, of which Kadyrov is president, had issued a public ultimatum to Dutch manager Ruud Gullit late on Monday: win your next match or else. Or else happened (Terek lost to Amkar Perm 0-1 last night).

The firing came one week after Gullit gave an open interview to The Daily Mail, where he admitted the money (and, er, adventure) drew him to the job in one of Russia’s most difficult republics, where life is far from normal and a huge Kadyrov cult of personality reigns. He issued the necessary platitudes: life is ok in the republic, and getting better. But he made a few no-no’s: criticizing the facilities and saying things like: “'I miss normal communication, banter with people. I miss my friends in Holland. They have visited me everywhere but why would they come here? You can't have a drink and you can't communicate with anyone.”

So Terek (read: Kadyrov) struck back with the ultimatum, saying: “Gullit should know that we invited him not to nightclubs, but to work in a soccer club.” And then the kicker: “Ramzan Kadyrov is extremely unhappy with Ruud Gullit’s approach to his duties.” And with that, he was gone.