Free porn: Not just on the Internet in India

This past week, I traveled to Orissa to visit Konark's famous Sun Temple, a UNESCO World Heritage Site.

Given India Today's dismay over the sudden invasion of the Internet, you'll be shocked to discover what I found. 

Nearly a thousand years before Al Gore invented the Internet, Indians had pioneered the field of free porn.

My guide, a guy named Sunil, explained it thus:

“See, here: 750 years ago, people were practicing all types of sexualities,” he announced, indicating an intriguing hieroglyph. “Polyandry, polygyny, polygamy,” he reeled. “Polyandry: One woman, two man. Polygyny: One man, two woman. Polygamy: Two man, two woman.”

We moved on.

“See, this one: 750 years ago two man were also lying together on the bed: Homosexuality.” He paused, then announced: “Homo.”

We moved on. Sunil indicated a bent figure showering a voluptuous and, well, nipply, woman with coins.

“Old man is wanting to lie with young woman. She is crying: 'Please, sir, don't spoil my life.'”

And on and on.

In case you're wondering, the tour cost me 200 rupees, or about $5.  The ancient porn, well, like the guys at Mastercard say:

It was WAY better than those circa 1970 Playboys my friend and I found hidden in his basement when we were 10.