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Yani Tseng: The best golfer you've never heard of

TAIPEI — Nobody has ever dominated professional golf quite like Taiwan’s Yani Tseng. Since turning pro back in 2008, the affable 23-year-old from the outskirts of Taipei has won more majors than future Hall of Famers Phil Mickelson, Tiger Woods and Vijay Singh combined. Now, if she could only work out how to get paid like those guys.

Penis formations popping up on Australian golf course

A $4,000 reward has been issued for information leading to the arrest of the vandal who burned penis-shaped formations into the grass at Cromer Golf Club on three occasions.
The vandalised green at Cromer Golf Club. How many penalties for interfering with a penis formation? Two, and a spanking with a 4-iron. (Manly Daily/Courtesy)

Please mind the penis on the 15th green.

It's nothing personal.

Come on, people, you know hard it is to line your put up over a burned penis formation?

There are players who get distracted by a tiny leaf that’s fallen onto the green.

What do you think they’ll do when faced with an immovable obstruction like this?

They might hyperventilate and angrily throw their club into the nearest pine tree. I have seen it happen over situations far less controversial.

Is anyone else utterly sick and tired of people not taking the game of golf seriously enough? 

I was practically reduced to tears when I heard of the hardship the Cromer Golf Club in Australia must endure these days: yes, someone has burned penis-shaped formations into the grass at the 15th green and 16th fairway.

The creative vandalism occurred sometime Tuesday, but this isn’t the first time phallic “crop circles” have appeared on the course.

It’s is the third time.

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